NiGHt RaiN: Basketcase

Friday, May 19, 2006

Basketcase

'If you don't like the way other people are doing it, then do the job yourself'

.....

A thousand and one apologies, but I really can't remember the exact way that phrase goes. It's something like that, but much nicer and probably much shorter. Either way, I'm sure you catch the meaning.

When you hear other people whining about how horrible someone does a certain task, or how they wish that the other person would do a better job, it tends to get on your nerves. It makes you think, If you're so good, then go and do the job yourself!. Or at least, that's they way I think. Not to say that I've never been that way before. Admittedly, we all have those moments which we are not proud of. But let bygones be bygones. We're supposed to talk about what I learned today.

The reason I picked this quote was because I heard someone complaining about how the other person was doing badly in whatever task that was supposed to be done, and even said 'I would have done better if I had been the one to do it'. This made me frown because frankly, it's annoying. If you're so good at it, I thought, then do it. At this point this phrase (yes, the wrong version) floated in my mind, and as the rest of the day resumed I had already decided on what I would pick for today's post.

But later on I learnt that there might be more to the phrase then I previously thought.The phrase doesn't necessarily apply to those who think I would have done better. It basically applies to people who complain or whine about other people.

I got into a horrible mood this morning at school. Not the 'I'm a storm, fear me, get out of my way' kinda bad mood, but the 'I'm bored, and I'm droopy' kinda mood. Well, it couldn't be helped. I was bored, and I was droopy (in a way), so I spent the whole day just wandering around, and even though it didn't exactly make things worse, it sure didn't make anything better. A few friends tried approaching me and revive me, but my heart was set. I refused to feel better, and just moped around the whole day. I think that, in the end, even the closest of my friends got bored with me. It's really obvious why; who would wanna hang around with a ghost who just wanders around in class and doesn't get involved in anything? I must have had this aura about me that just repels people, animals, or dust; everybody just stayed away. Even my library book could offer no comfort amidst the 'THIS IS THE GAME OF CONCENTRATION, CLAP CLAP". Basically, it stunk.

Amazingly, I spent the whole day of about 4 hours just having this huge black cloud hanging over me. Just thinking about it now makes me wanna kick myself. I think the Cheerful Dee would have looked at me and go"Tsk tsk tsk", wagging fingers and all.

Realising that nothing worked, I looked around the two classrooms. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, and I wanted to something right now. I didn't want to play the games, nor did I sleep, so I chose the best option there was; join a talking circle.

Nadhirah was there, with Su Syak Basirah and Mas. They were all sitting in a circle telling ghost stories, and though I don't normally enjoy listening to those kind of tales (I am not afraid!), I couldn't be bothered to care. Anything was good enough. I grabbed a chair, dragged it to them, and announced, "I'm sitting here, ok?" Luckily they didn't have any problem with that and invited me in a friendly manner, and so I sat. I just listened to their talkings, and I figured it wasn't all that bad. Then they started talking about dreams, and I started joining in their talking. Then they made hilarious fart noises, and we all laughed. It was amazingly great fun.

The final hour spent with them passed quickly, and by the time class was over I was surprised to find myself sorry that we had to end our little games. We promised to talk again on Monday, and that made me glad.

Going home with Loi, I realised that, even though I was annoyed with the person who had complained, I had been just like her all along. I didn't exactly whine, but in a way I did complain to myself about how I wished I wasn't at school. Really, all it took was just sitting with some people and talking. I think that I had unconciously expected people to ask me to join them (which they did not. how dissappointing), and that was what ruined my day. If I had just did something by my own will in the first place, I would have had some fun a long time ago, and instead of a black cloud hanging over my head, I would have had Sirius (brightest star in the sky. sun's too bright for me).

I learnt last time that getting up after falling was hard, and today I learnt it the hard way in a small lesson at school. Next time you feel bored, or sad, or down, don't expect others to get you up. Get your butt up, get it back into this world, and start whistling.

Deenana at 5:07 PM